My sister in law sent me some photos she found from about 20 years ago. Thank you Karen! My thoughts at the time the photo was snapped…
My Thoughts At The Time...
Oh, gosh, will I look fat?
I’m so tired- will that show?
I wish I had worn something else.
I'm hardly in pictures. I'm always the one behind the camera. It felt strange to be one of the subject.
But what else I remember about that moment…
I remember the moment this photo was taken. I remember how it felt holding my niece who is now in college. I remember my son crawling over me so he could give me a hug and kiss. He is having his own baby in a few months. I remember how it felt then though. I remember how it felt. I also let the worries about how I looked get in the way. UGH- I can't believe that now!
And What I Think Now...
I wish I looked that good now! I was happy and content. Nobody cared or noticed my weight, my clothes or my level of fatigue. I sure don't notice that now!
However, even now when I think about having my picture taken, I think about the 20 pounds I want to lose; I wonder if I look tired and old. But I also remember what I’ll think about that picture in just a few years. I’ll think- ‘DANG, I LOOKED GOOD!” I’ll wonder why I didn’t just enjoy myself. I’ll wonder why I had all the worries.
Why Talk About This?
- It’s important to exist in photos. It’s part of our legacy- for ourselves and our family-some family members we won’t even get to meet.
- We nee to exist in photos for our kids for those of us with kids. They don’t care if we are a little overweight or not what we would consider ‘perfect.’ I’m sure my son will look at those photos and just be happy with the few few photos he has of me.
- We can now exist in VIDEOS too! Have you seen some of my Living Portraits?
FaceBook Live- Tuesday Tell All
I started a FaceBook Live campaign 3 weeks ago with the mission of sharing the stories behind the photos. I meet such interesting people with stories that pull at the heart strings. I hear stories that I will never forget and I see the stories in their faces. What would life be like without stories to decorate our lives?
I’m talking about my own photo today- the story is about what I felt at the time. The story is about what I feel when I look at that photo above. This is about what my clients, friends and family tell me about getting their picture taken-
- It's scary
- I have 20 pounds to lose first
- I'm too old now
- Oh, wait until my arms aren't so fat
I'm sure you can fill in the rest of this list...
So, back to the story...I met a young woman who really changed my way of thinking. She is in her 20s and accustomed to being in front of the camera as an actress and dancer. We were talking about how much we could all teach one another. I shared my anxiety about ‘going live’ on Facebook. My assumptions were that the young are more comfortable in front of a camera given the number of cameras in cell phones and the invention of ‘selfies.’ I grew up with a film camera that I had to save up my babysitting money in order to get pictures developed. We waited for our photos, and could never imagine what it would be like to get great images immediately like we do now.
We now get immediate satisfaction with our pics, AND we can certainly go live for the whole world anytime we want. She corrected me though, and explained how the youth might be accustomed to taking their own photos AND they are also use filters regularly. Their photos are filtered and far from ‘live’ or real. “They have the same anxieties as you do about showing their ‘real selves,’ she told me. I was so surprised to hear this! The young are also concerned about perception-because after all- people can be wonderful and loving but can also be mean.
I thought a lot about what she had to tell me. The question of ‘what is beauty?’ is big big big! It’s a lot to think about.
Many will say that a confident person exudes beauty. They own it. I agree.
I’m going to let this awesome video tell you what I think about a Beautiful Woman.
It’s about what’s inside when in fact we do judge on look initially. Keep in mind that we judge on our feeling at the time and also based on our own history too. Our perception is just that- OUR perception.
What other people think of us when in face they’re really just more worried about themselves-probably not really noticing you.
What to do
Get your own pictures taken- families, you and your pet (s), couples, you and your friends- it’s all part of YOUR story.
You are perfect now-forget about waiting until this or that.
The time is now!
Tuesday Tell All with Carmen Buck Photography
Tuesdays at 12N CST on Facebook Live- The stories behind the pictures